The joint meeting where I meet with both participants is not the first meeting in the process. In Civil and Commercial mediations I hold a confidential pre-mediation meeting with you and your legal advisor to apprise myself of all relevant background and your hopes for what the process will achieve. These private meetings continue on the mediation day as I shuttle between the parties, gathering and sharing information (concealing as much as you tell me to). In this way I develop a sharp sense of where the shared interests are, how far apart you are from the other participant, and whether that gap can be bridged. In Workplace mediations there are two similar private sessions in which you help me identify your interests (a joint session takes up the remainder of the time).
How will you know what my interests are?
“You say that you will help me towards an agreement that will serve my interests. But how will you know what my interests are, especially when confidentiality is at the heart of the process?”